Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
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