Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
