my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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