1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
