I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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