i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
