when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
