So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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