Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
