Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Randomize
