East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
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