i think i have herpe
just one?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
