Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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