what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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