Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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