Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
