I murdered the dance floor call the cops
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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