it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
So much rum. So many feels.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
