This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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