I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
