Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
