yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
