did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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