Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
