He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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