Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
