It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Randomize
