I puked a lego.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
The Olympian is in my bed
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
