Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
