im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
