I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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