I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
