What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
