there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
