his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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