no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
