she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
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