try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
