actually, I'm a sock model
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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