lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
