i barfeds in our rink
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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