Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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