Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
