Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
