So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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