I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
