i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
