Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
it hurts more in the daytime
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Randomize
