windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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