Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
