if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
